Choosing grace over anger is a natural struggle for a mom.
Many times, I find myself in a tug-of-war of emotions as anger attempts to win over grace. How do I go about choosing grace when I am constantly bombarded by the struggles of parenting?
A memory of coming home with my arms full of grocery bags always comes to mind as I think of this. My arms were full of grocery bags as I entered the house, and I carefully set the bags down on the kitchen counters. As I was unloading the bags, my oldest came into the kitchen. With eager hands, he started unloading groceries alongside me. Somehow as he picked up the eggs in his earnest way, the egg carton slipped from his little hands and dropped to the floor.
Even though my back was to him, I heard the sound and the soft gasp slip from his lips. Without thinking, I reacted in a less-than-pleasant way.
The moment the words flew out of my mouth, I wished for them back.
I was not choosing grace at that moment.
With his big brown eyes looking up at me, he quietly said, “It really was an accident, Mom. You say we all make mistakes.”
Instantly, I covered him with a hug and apologized for my quick reaction. We moved on with our day, but that moment has been forever marked in my memory.
I am not sure when I started chasing perfection, but I realized I was in a mighty race for it. My expectations of myself, my kids, and my husband were only leading to constant frustration. God does not call for us to be perfect and He is constantly pouring His grace upon us. I freely and willingly accept grace daily. Yet, in everyday moments, it can be a great challenge for me to pour this grace onto others.
When my husband forgets something at the store.
My child throwing the tenth tantrum of the day.
A carton of eggs cracked on the floor.
In the unpredictable moments of chaos, it can be difficult to choose grace. My natural inclination is to respond with anger or frustration, but those reactions do not characterize the life I want to live.
I do not want to live a life full of hurried replies void of grace.
My heart’s desire is for a home that is full of grace for each other and grace for the world. One of the greatest ways I can share about God’s love is by showing grace to others.
As I wake every morning, I am grateful for brand new moments made possible by God’s grace. My hope is to show grace more to the ones I love and the people I come into contact with. In every moment, we all have a choice. When our day is not turning out how we expect, when plans fall through, when the eggs fall to the ground: are we choosing grace?
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How about you? Do you struggle with choosing grace over anger?
One of my favorite books to help with this struggle is Count to Nine: Nine Liberating Steps for Mom Frustration and Anger. This book is a must-read for moms!