Finding True Community

Looking for a community? Read these tips to help you find a good friend group! 

Finding a mom community of friends can be a struggle! I can recall one season that I felt the struggle of this.

It was a Tuesday morning and the rain was drizzling down outside. I was weary and worn down from parenting demands, and settled down with my cup of reheated coffee. Instantly, my fingers went to my Facebook app and I opened it up unknowingly seeking community. To my tired eyes, all I saw was a world of amazing friendships that left me reflecting on my current state of loneliness.

As women, we naturally crave true deep friendship. I believe we were created to connect and encourage one another. I also believe that God has a reason for everything, so I started to pray to ask God why I was feeling this way.

Friendships come and go just like the seasons.

Sometimes we are friends with someone for a specific reason at a specific time. There was a time where I was in a season of feeling alone.  I craved the true deep friendship as it seemed like countless people that I had poured myself into have taken a left. As I felt empty, I realized a few things.

I cannot expect others to make me happy.

My happiness is not the responsibility of my husband or kids or friends.  Only God alone can bring me the true joy that reaches deep in my soul.

Sometimes we overlook the truest friends of all.  

In this season, I poured my heart out to God one morning asking boldly for friendship. While I had some friends that lived out of state, I truly wanted an encouraging local community.

As the day went on, my daughter ended up getting very sick. It was a long day partially spent at a pediatricians’ office and the other part spent holding her. As any mama knows, caring for sick little ones can be especially draining. The next day she was a little better.  However, I still spent the majority of the day balancing caring for her and keeping my two little boys out of trouble.

Throughout the day there were two friends who specifically texted me to find out how she was doing. One even told me she was bringing us dinner. It was as if a light bulb had gone off.   I had asked boldly for friends and God revealed a community that I already had. It was like a veil had been dropped revealing constant friends.

We all crave community. We need to do life together.

Even though we know this, it can be easy to get lost in the role of motherhood. Our kids consume our every waking thought and the last thing we think of is friendship. When you are battling a teething baby or a trying toddler, it can sound better to just stay home and hidden behind your four walls. In the past,  I felt this way as I  didn’t want people to see our moments. I wanted people to see that I had it all together because I had bought into the lie that everyone had it together.

When I stepped out from that lie, I saw that God wants us to open up our lives to others- even the messy parts. Friends, let others in. We need each other.

Are you in a season of feeling alone? Look around you- who could you connect with this week and start building community with?